Drunken Chicken, Christmas Trees and Dave

I am sitting at my desk this morning trying to deal with the weight of what this day holds for me. April 20th. Just another typical Monday. Only this day holds for me a time when I feel my life was changed. It is difficult for me to believe that Garth and Zack have been gone for three years. And still, there is a part of me that simply does not believe it is true. The part of me that still, on occasion, will pick up the phone to call them or think about visiting. What is that part of my memory that doesn't remind me that they are gone?

So, like an idiot, I chose to get on facebook this morning. I then proceeded to look through pictures people had posted, read their status updates about remembering and then, the final straw, read Doug's blog entry (which you should read, but be prepared for). I am now sitting here, in an office with 6 other people, trying not to completely break down. So, how do I cope? How do I complete the rest of this day without being a shell of myself? Easy...remember the good times. Cover my sadness with sarcasm, just as Garth and Zack would have both wanted and expected.

The first memory that comes to mind was the time Garth wanted to make a group of us dinner. He had been to TGIFridays a few too many times, and he wanted to make chicken similar to their jack daniels chicken. So what did he do? He proceeded to soak a chicken all evening in whiskey. Not deluded, not for an hour....80 proof whiskey, on it's own, overnight. As you can imagine, this chicken could have become a drinking game all in itself, because eating just a bit of it would have made anyone completely drunk. Except maybe Garth. Who stubbornly tried very hard to eat some of it, until he finally gave in and said it was terrible.

Doug reminded me of the time we were all over at Fritz's old house. It was February or March, and the Christmas tree that Doug, Zack, Lee and Nathan had put up was still in the middle of the living room. It was supposed to be Nathan's job to take it down and the rest of his roommates were becoming more and more discontent with it's presence in their house. So, after some complaining and a bit of alcohol, I convinced Garth, Zack and Lee to carry it into Nathan's room, and plug in the lights. Which was hysterical until Nathan got home. Thinking about that huge Christmas tree in the middle of Nathan's teeny tiny room STILL brings a huge smile to my face. Garth and Zack took all the heat from Nathan and never pulled me into, even though it was my idea in the first place. So Nathan, if you're reading this, I apologize for the frustration but I don't regret the memory.

And finally, perhaps one of my favorite memories, was on my 21st birthday. Dave Matthews Band was in town and Garth, Zack, Kevin and Doug decided to take me to the concert. We had terrible lawn seats, but I remember it was a gorgeous evening with perfect weather. There are several parts of this evening that stand out to me. One was watching Zack's face as he experienced Dave Matthews for the first time. He hadn't really heard this music before the concert and had really come more for the company. I just remember him laying back, relaxed on the lawn and smiling at the new music. His love for music of all kinds was one of the most endearing things about him. Then there was Garth. Garth was up, dancing around, moving to the music, jumping during certain songs and yelling for them to play the favorites. He also had no shame in buying me drinks all night and spending $22 on a t-shirt so I would be able to remember the evening. It was the perfect birthday.

The following night, Dave Matthews was performing a second concert. Around 4pm that day, Garth called and asked what I was doing that night. I was working, but was getting done around 6pm. He suggested that we drive over to the concert and see if we could buy some tickets. I thought he was crazy because we had just gone the night before, but he reminded me that they never played the same set twice and that I hadn't heard some of my favorite songs. "If we go tonight, you might hear some of the stuff you missed last night. Hell, I'll even pay for your ticket." So on we went. The second night rivaled the first as far as the music went, plus we got much better seats for half the price. The whole night payed off when they started playing "Ants Marching," which is by far my favorite Dave Matthew's song. Garth and I cheered, danced and jumped up and down to the beat. It was great. That was the thing about Garth...he was always convincing me to do these great and unexpected things, because that's how he lived his life.

I miss them both very much. But I am grateful for the time we spent together and the hundreds of memories I will have forever.

Visiting D.C.

No. We don't have the list yet. Let's just get that out of the way.

So, what else has been going on? Actually, quite a bit. Kevin has been in D.C. since Sunday, March 15th for a training with the Air Force. Since they put him up in a nice hotel, I decided to join him for a little vacation. After working a little extra for the past three weeks, I built up some time off and have been here since last Thursday. It has been really nice to be able to relax. Not worrying about work, getting the house ready for sale, the list...ok, well maybe I've still been thinking about the list, but thats normal, right?

While we've been here Kevin has been in training during the days but had this past weekend free. During his time off we took a tour of the Kennedy Center, which neither of us had ever done. This building is incredible. It has five theatres in one building and beautiful sculptures, artwork, marble and chandeliers throughout. What I didn't know is that JFK was working on this building when he was assasinated, and after he died, leaders from all over the world sent gifts in memory of JFK to the Kennedy Center. This has created not only a wonderful performing facility but also some wonderful history.

This is one of the lobbies with entrance to three of the five theatres. Each of the chandeliers is made of crystal and was donated from a different country (Sweden I think?). It really is a magnificient building.

For each of the theatres there is a box for the President. It is in the center of the theatre and has a lobby area and then seats in the theatre. Apparently when the President is not using the box, other employees at the White House try to get access to this special feature. Can you imagine going to the opera and the President is sitting on your left or right? I can't.

Possibly my favorite part of the tour was the Israel Room. This is a donor lobby on the second floor, but everything in it was donated by Israel. On the wall is inscribed Psalm 150 and on the ceiling is a mural with different scenes from the Bible where music was important.

I just thought that is was interesting that there wasan entire room devoted to Israel and that it focused on the presence of music in the Bible. I thought it was great. The picture of the mural is the part that showed David playing his harp. The entire mural

was really beautiful.

The final picture from the Kennedy Center tour is from the opera house. There were these beautiful chandeliers that looked like fireworks exploding. As I was standing in the

opera house I couldn't help think about Marci and hoping that maybe one day I would get to see her perform there. Here is a picture of the beautiful chandelier.

After the tour, Kevin and I met up with Mimi, Derek and Andrew for lunch. Mimi and Andrew went to Wright State with Kevin and are interning at Andrew's Air Force Base in D.C. Then on Sunday we went to the museum of American History. It was a beautiful day, so we spent some time just sitting on the National Mall watching people walk by and enjoying the sunshine.

I think the best part has been to just get away from real life for a little while. When you're on vacation you can't spend your evenings doing projects or your downtime cleaning the house. I think it has been really good for Kevin and I to get away and enjoy time just being together. Of course tomorrow is back to real life...oh well.

And no Doug, I did not protest while I was here in D.C. Just in case you were wondering....

List Watch: Day 326

Okay...so maybe it hasn't been that long. But it feels like it.

For those of you who are not aware (though if you've read any of my previous posts I can't see how you're behind), Kevin and I are waiting for a list of bases that will have psycologist positions available for placement next year. We had originally thought that we would see the list by the end of January, but as you can see, it is February 17th and here we sit.

It has become pratically impossible for me to concentrate on anything else. I have been wondering what locations will be available, if we'll get one of our top choices, if I'll be able to find a job there, etc. etc. etc.

Besides the craziness in my head, here's some other things that have been going on. I'm into my fifth month at HRTC and I am now truly feeling like I made the right decision. While everything is not perfect there, it is indeed less stressful. Driving in the direction of Dayton instead of Cincinnati has decreased my stress level 150%. But the atmosphere at work makes a difference too. While I am very grateful for the time I spent at Playhouse because I learned so much, I feel like at HRTC that I am really able to take some ownership of the projects I'm working on. The executive director listens to my ideas and typically gives me the authority to carry them out, which is a great feeling.

The difficult thing is trying to raise money in this economic environment. Even though the economy was in worse shape in the 80's then it is now, Obama's constant "doom and gloom" talk is making everyone uneasy. Comparing our current economic situation to the Great Depression (which is a gigantic leap from the truth) makes businesses and individuals uneasy and is actually causing the economy to slow down more, not improve it. Therefore, people aren't as interested in giving to something considered a luxury, like the arts. I ask Kevin all the time why I didn't attempt a job in the for-profit world. Ah right....there's that whole passion about the arts thing. I just hope that wherever we move next I'll actually be able to find a job.

That is, if we ever get the list....

You say hello, but I say goodbye

Wow. It has been quite a while since I posted. Here are some things I'm thinking about as the New Year continues to tick on...

The Inauguration

As I'm sure everyone else does, I've got this weeks presidential inauguration on my mind. Tuesday will represent a historic day in the history of America. It is truly amazing that it has taken 43 previous presidents before an African-American was elected. As I have said before, I am proud that we live in a country that is taking steps towards being colorblind. While I think there are those that voted for Obama because he is black, I know many voted because he represents something they can believe in. It is interesting to be in my particular position - both proud and disappointed at the same time. I wish that our first African American President was someone I thought was good for the country. Someone who represented at least a couple of my ideals. However, that is not the way it is. Tuesday will be both a historical and sad day for me.

Bush leaving office

Of course, with a new president coming in, this of course means the previous one is leaving. Now, I know that I am in the minority, but I see George W. Bush as a great president. Did he make mistakes? Of course - he's human. However, I think the positive has far outweighed the negative. When he was elected he had no idea his presidency would be about terrorism and keeping this country safe. September 11th changed everything, and I think he did the best he could with the information he had at the time. I know, I know - there were no weapons of mass destruction. But at the time of invading Iraq it was believed that there were. I think he did what he thought was right, and for those of you who want to argue with me, Obama said the same thing this week. So argue with him.

Here is an article listing 10 things that Bush got right. I thought it was well written and celebrated a president that has be harshly criticized. I worry about a president that is more interested in popular opinion (and being compared to Lincoln before even taking office) and one who made choices he thought were right for America, no matter what the polls said.

http://www.weeklystandard.com/Content/Public/Articles/000/000/015/986rockt.asp?pg=1

And here is an opinion piece by Charles Krauthammer which I think is interesting. The candidate Obama bashed Bush, because he knew it would get him elected. I don't think anyone thought Obama would be agreeing with many of Bush's policies so quickly...except maybe Dick Cheney.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/01/15/AR2009011503149.html?hpid=opinionsbox1

Moving

This week I have been thinking constantly about what my and Kevin's future holds. Hopefully within the next four weeks we will get a list of available bases. I think this might be the hardest thing to wait for. Once we know what bases are available we will truly be able to start thinking about the future. What locations are a real possibility and what isn't.

I've also been thinking a lot about selling our house. With the basement very close to being finished, I have created a list of about 15 other things that need to be done before we put the house on the market. Some of them are small (painting the kitchen) while others are a little larger (power wash and stain the back porch). We are hoping to get a majority of the projects finished by mid-March and put the house on the market at that point. We have no idea what we will ask for our house, if anyone will be interested and how long it will take to sell. We won't actually be moving until the end of August, but we feel like the more lead time we can put on listing the house, the better off we'll be. Plan B is if we are unable to sell by August, Stefanie (Kevin's sister) will seriously consider moving in and renting from us. So at least we have a Plan B.

Vacation

I am truly itching to go on a vacation somewhere. There are several shows in NYC I would love to go see right now, but it is such an expensive place to go. I also would love to go somewhere warm, especially since this winter has been so cold. We don't really have any vacations in the works right now, but I'm hoping we can put something on the calendar so we have something to look forward to.

I think that's all for now. When the list of bases comes out, I will keep you updated. Hope you all are having a wonderful new year.

The End's Not Near, It's Here

This past week has been a blur. First was Christmas Eve service at Westminster. I have to admit that I was kind of dreading this service. I was more interested in leaving early and getting to Louisville earlier. But going to this service is a tradition that Kevin has had for several years, and it his one of his favorite parts of the holiday...so we stayed and sang. Halfway through "Masters in this Hall," the opening song we sing each year, I realized how happy I was to be there. The service went so quickly this year. All of the songs went better than rehearsal and the sermon was interesting and uplifting. I feel truly blessed to be a part of this church and I am happy Kevin convinced me to stay for it.

The original plan was to drive after the service (around 11:30pm) to Louisville so we could wake up there on Christmas morning. However, Kevin was extremely tired and I didn't want to make the drive with him asleep, so we went to Middletown and slept and drove the next morning. If you've never driven early on Christmas morning, you really should sometime. There were only a few cars on the road. The morning was beautiful. It was just peaceful...being in the car with Kevin and Oscar, driving along. It was really nice.

We arrived for breakfast with the Bratcher's around 9am. It was really great to be with the family. We had breakfast, opened gifts (I got a new Kate Spade!), went to see the new Jim Carrey movie (the only one we could all agree on :) ) and then Derek made us dinner. It is always nice to be home in Louisville for Christmas. The home I grew up in, the home I hope to someday take my kids to. I am thankful for my family and the time we get to spend together.

Tonight Kevin and I are going to see a movie and have dinner with Mark. It will be a nice, relaxing evening...we might even go to bed before midnight! I guess we're getting old...hahaha. Tomorrow morning I am setting off for a little social trip. First I am going to Chicago for a few days to see my good friend Jordan. We are planning some shopping, some sushi and some catchup time. Then on Saturday I am going to make a stop in Indy to see Marci, Leah and Lauren. It will be a nice weekend and hopefully will get traveling out of my system for a little while.

As I look forward to the beginning of 2009, I wanted to look back on my favorite moments in 2008. Kevin finding out that his residency would be with the Air Force was definitely one. Not only were we excited that he got placed, but we were also happy that he got his first choice. We had no idea at the time that 6 months later the economy would take a swift downturn that would have made it difficult for him to get a job at the end of his residency year. His four-year commitment to the Air Force ensures that he has a job for the next four years...Something that felt so up to chance has truly been a blessing in our lives.

Another great moment was when Lauren told me she was pregnant. I know Lauren has wanted kids for some time now and I feel so happy for her and Andrew and the addition they will soon be making to their family. Even though the baby won't actually come until 2009, I think her getting pregnant was a 2008 highlight. And I can't wait to be an Aunt!

While this might sound corny, I think the best part of 2008 was spending another year with Kevin. I have a hard time leaving him for extended periods of time, and my favorite part of the day is when we're home together. I keep waiting for that feeling to go away, but it hasn't faded yet in 2.5 years. I guess the hope is that it never does.

I hope you have a wonderful New Year's Eve, and a Happy New Year. See you in 2009!

Christmas Part 1

This past weekend was the Hurley portion of the Holiday week. When Kevin and I got engaged, we set up a yearly way of splitting up the holidays. We spend Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve with one of our families and Christmas Day with the other. This back and forth system has worked pretty well in the past, until this year. This year it is the Bratcher's year to have us on Christmas Day and the Hurley's year to have us on Christmas Even. But because of Kevin's crazy "days of leave" it made more sense for us to spend Monday and Tuesday at the Hurleys. Kevin's brother, Mark, came into town on Saturday and the Hurley extended family Christmas party was that same night, so Kevin and I decided to spend Saturday thru Tuesday with his family.

Saturday evenings Hurley Christmas party was similar to past years...we weren't sure who was coming, there were some interesting presents in the gift exchange, and I lost at poker due to frustration. Let me explain...first the gift exchange. The Hurley's do a gift exchange similar to many people. Each person draws a number 1 - however many people are there. The first person opens a present from under the tree. Then the second person can either steal the first person's present or pick another one from under the tree. This goes on until everyone has a present. The difference between a normal gift exchange and the one at the Hurley's is that the Hurleys have some strange rules. Strange rule number one is that the person that draws #1 gets to be the last person to steal a present...I have never seen this done in any other circle. The other rule that is non-existant is that a gift can be stolen several times in one round.

So, here is the situation. There were two presents where lottery tickets were involved. Mark, Kevin's cousin-in-law Nikki and Kevin's cousin McKayla all wanted lottery tickets. Mark and Nikki both had lottery ticket gifts, and McKayla stole Mark's gift, so Mark stole Nikki's, so Nikki stole McKayla. This circle went round and round about four times before Nikki finally decided to steal something else. It was the most entertaining part of the evening.

The other funny part of the gift exchange was the gifts themselves. Steve, my father-in-law, brought tow-ropes (which he wanted for himself), then chose his own gift when his number came around. Kevin ended up with a coffeemaker that was the gift his Aunt Donna had won in last year's gift exchange. And Mark brought what he called a "party in a bag," which turned out to be a 24 oz Budweiser and some lottery tickets. It made for a hilarious evening. All in all it was an interesting evening.

Sunday was a nice dinner at Mark Manley's house. Kevin had hoped that he would cook for his family while they were all in town, and Mark kindly agreed. It was an extremely relaxing evening filled with good food, great conversation and wonderful company. Definitely one of the highlights of the evening.

We spent Monday and Tuesday playing the wii, having a nice "Christmas" dinner, opening presents, watching movies, hanging out and laughing at the hilarious things Mark Hurley tends to say. These past few days have just made it more clear that Kevin and I would love to live closer to his brother -- we simply do not see him enough.

Tomorrow Kevin is going to work, yes, on Christmas Eve. We will have dinner with Mark Manley and his family, sing in the Westminster Christmas Eve service, then head down to the Bratcher's for Christmas day. I am extremely excited to see my family and I am hoping it is a relaxing and fun weekend. I hope that you have a very Merry Christmas and special time with the ones that you love. I feel truly blessed to have two families, the Bratchers and the Hurleys, that I love very much. Merry Christmas!

Brit Signs Off

While I know many of you might not care, this evening was Brit Hume's last evening anchoring the Fox News program "Special Report with Brit Hume". Brit has been with the Fox News Channel for over 10 years and his program is the highest rated political program on cable television. Why am I dedicating a post to this? Because Brit has become a part of mine and Kevin's daily life. Each night we sit down after dinner or during and watch Brit talk about the national news. This is something we've done consistantly since we got married 2.5 years ago.

Brit will definitely be missed. Kevin and I hope that his replacement, Bret Baier, will be as consistant, entertaining and balanced as Brit always has been. Scoff if you want, but for a Fox News reporter, I feel that Brit has always managed to lead a discussion that shows two points of view - something severely lacking from many news programs. While Brit is not leaving Fox News altogether, we will not see him as regulary, and he will be missed.